This guy NEEDS to find a new hobby!!! A “heavily intoxicated” Scottish man is in jail because he couldn’t stop calling in fake emergencies. The UK version of 911 is 999 and Donald Robertson called to say he was trapped under a capsized canoe and drowning in a local river. That triggered a major emergency response only to find out there was no canoe or man in the water. Robertson then called to report a farm fire, which was also false, then pushed his luck to report animals in distress. He cost the local budget nearly nine-thousand dollars with his hoaxes and now Mr. Robertson is in a jail cell for nine months.